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Stephen Leacock Quotes

I hope you find these Motivational Stephen Leacock Quotes useful in achieving your personal and career goals in life.

A half truth, like half a brick, is always more forcible
as an argument than a whole one.
It carries better.
- Stephen Leacock

Related topics: Trust

Many a man in love with a dimple makes the mistake
of marrying the whole girl.
- Stephen Leacock

Personally, I would sooner have written Alice in Wonderland
than the whole Encyclopedia Britannica.
- Stephen Leacock

Men are able to trust one another, knowing the exact
degree of dishonesty they are entitled to expect.
- Stephen Leacock

 

It is to be observed that 'angling' is the name given
to fishing by people who can't fish.
- Stephen Leacock

Advertising: the science of arresting the human intelligence
long enough to get money from it.
- Stephen Leacock

Writing is no trouble: you just jot down ideas as they occur to you.
The jotting is simplicity itself - it is the occurring which is difficult.
- Stephen Leacock


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- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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It may be those who do most, dream most.
- Stephen Leacock

What we call creative work, ought not to be called work at all,
because it isn't.
I imagine that Thomas Edison never did a day's work in his last fifty years.
- Stephen Leacock

It takes a good deal of physical courage to ride a horse.
This, however, I have.
I get it at about forty cents a flask,
and take it as required.
- Stephen Leacock

Now, the essence, the very spirit of Christmas is that
we first make believe a thing is so,
and lo, it presently turns out to be so.
- Stephen Leacock

There are two things in ordinary conversation which
ordinary people dislike -
information and wit.
- Stephen Leacock

The Lord said 'let there be wheat' and Saskatchewan was born.
- Stephen Leacock

Life, we learn too late, is in the living,
the tissue of every day and hour.
- Stephen Leacock

It's called political economy because it is has nothing
to do with either politics or economy.
- Stephen Leacock

I detest life-insurance agents: they always argue that I shall some day die,
which is not so.
- Stephen Leacock

He flung himself from the room, flung himself upon
his horse and rode madly off in all directions.
- Stephen Leacock

A sportsman is a man who every now and then,
simply has to get out and kill something.
- Stephen Leacock

We think of the noble object for which the professor appears to-night,
we may be assured that the Lord will forgive any one
who will laugh at the professor.
- Stephen Leacock

Astronomy teaches the correct use of the sun and the planets.
- Stephen Leacock

Each section of the British Isles has its own way of laughing,
except Wales, which doesn't.
- Stephen Leacock

If every day in the life of a school could be the last day but one,
there would be little fault to find with it.
- Stephen Leacock

It's a lie, but Heaven will forgive you for it.
- Stephen Leacock

Golf may be played on Sunday, not being a game within the view of the law,
but being a form of moral effort.
- Stephen Leacock

The classics are only primitive literature.
They belong to the same class as primitive machinery
and primitive music and primitive medicine.
- Stephen Leacock

In ancient times they had no statistics so they had to fall back on lies.
- Stephen Leacock

The landlady of a boarding-house is a parallelogram -
that is,
an oblong angular figure, which cannot be described,
but which is equal to anything.
- Stephen Leacock

On the same bill and on the same side of it there should
not be two charges for the same thing.
- Stephen Leacock

Electricity is of two kinds, positive and negative.
The difference is, I presume, that one comes a little more expensive,
but is more durable; the other is a cheaper thing,
but the moths get into it.
- Stephen Leacock

A life lived in fear is a life half lived.
- Anonymous

How you respond to the challenge in the second half
will determine what you become after the game,
whether you are a winner or a loser.
- Lou Holtz

Stand up to your obstacles
and do something about them.
You will find that they haven't
half the strength you think they have.
- Norman Vincent Peale

Confidence is half of victory.
- Yiddish Proverb

After fifteen minutes I wanted to marry her,
and after half an hour
I completely gave up the idea of stealing her purse.
- the movie Take the Money and Run (1969)

Humans are amphibians - half spirit and half animal.
As spirits they belong to the eternal world,
but as animals they inhabit time.
- C. S. Lewis

A friendship will be young after the lapse of half a century;
a passion is old at the end of three months.
- Madame Swetchine

The wish for healing has always been half of health.
- Lucius Annaeus Seneca

This communicating of a man's self to his friend
works two contrary effects;
for it redoubleth joys, and cutteth griefs in half.
- Francis Bacon

Half the people you know are below average.
- Anonymous

Barf: I'm a mog: half man, half dog. I'm my own best friend!
- the movie Spaceballs (1987)

Words, like nature, half reveal and half conceal the soul within.
- Alfred Lord Tennyson

Half a truth is often a great lie.
- Benjamin Franklin

Many important things shouldn't be done half-way.
Think of getting married, having children,
starting a business, changing your career.
There are times to gather your courage
and make the leap, the whole leap.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Knowledge is soon changed, then lost in the mist, an echo half-heard.
- Gene Wolfe

Crazy is walking down the street
with half a cantaloupe on your head,
muttering; "I'm a hamster, I'm a hamster."
- the movie Spy Hard (1996)

Half the world is composed of idiots,
the other half, of people clever enough
to take indecent advantage of them.
- Walter Kerr

Half of everything you were ever taught is wrong;
the question is which half.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

There are a terrible lot of lies going about the world,
and the worst of it is that half of them are true.
- Winston Churchill

What would be the use of immortality to a person
who cannot use well a half an hour.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Rarely do we find men who willingly engage in hard, solid thinking.
There is an almost universal quest
for easy answers and half-baked solutions.
Nothing pains some people more than having to think.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards.
- Benjamin Franklin

It is incumbent on every generation
to pay its own debts as it goes.
A principle which if acted on would
save one-half the wars of the world.
- Thomas Jefferson

I can think of nothing more boring for the American people
than to have to sit in their living rooms for a whole half hour
looking at my face on their television screens.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

Think of how stupid the average person is,
and realize half of them are stupider than that.
- George Carlin

The marvelous richness of human experience
would lose something of rewarding joy
if there were no limitations to overcome.
The hilltop hour would not be half so wonderful
if there were no dark valleys to traverse.
- Helen Keller

The rite of the rings appeals yet appalls:
a cutting, a joining, a losing, a gaining.
One becomes half, as two become one.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

One minute you're in the lunchroom at Glenwood High
and you ... blink and you're 40,
you blink again and you can see movies
at half price on a senior citizen's pass.
Ask not for whom the bell tolls, or to put it more accurately,
ask not for whom the toilet flushes.
- the Woody Allen movie Celebrity

I'm half alive but I feel mostly dead.
- Jewel

We should not pretend to understand
the world only by the intellect;
we apprehend it just as much by feeling.
Therefore, the judgment of the intellect is,
at best, only the half of truth, and must, if it be honest,
also come to an understanding of its inadequacy.
- Carl Jung

America is the best half-educated country in the world.
- Nicholas M. Butler

A prudent question is one-half of wisdom.
- Francis Bacon

Success to me is having ten honeydew melons and eating
only the top half of each slice.
- Barbra Streisand

I started on an Apple II, which I had bought at the
very end of 1978 for half of my annual income.
I made $4,500 a year, and I spent half of it on the computer.
- Bill Budge

Half of the modern drugs could well be thrown out of the window,
except that the birds might eat them.
- Martin Henry Fischer

I don't know why people question the academic training of an athlete.
Fifty percent of the doctors in this country graduated
in the bottom half of their classes.
- Al McGuire

Most people think that anger is an instinctive response,
and that some people were just born with the temperament
to get angrier faster than others.
That statement is only half right.
Anger is an instinctive response.
We respond to an affront with anger essentially instantaneously -
much too quickly for conscious thought to be called upon.
But the instinct of the anger response
can be trained through conscious repetition,
visualization, and coaching.
Visualization is seeing the event
we desire to master in our mind's eye.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

A painting that is well composed is half finished.
- Pierre Bonnard

Rome has not seen a modern building in more than half a century.
It is a city frozen in time.
- Richard Meier

Times like these, dark times,
they do funny things to people.
They can tear them apart.
- the movie Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince (2009)

Half of the American people have never read a newspaper.
Half never voted for President.
One hopes it is the same half.
- Gore Vidal

About half my designs are controlled fantasy,
15 percent are total madness and the rest are bread-and-butter designs.
- Manolo Blahnik


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May the world be kind to you, and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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